#edtwt I’m forever jealous of people who look their BMI </3 thigh gap literally non existent atp

#edtwt Eating raw veggies everyday sure made my blood test look incredibly good.. she literally called it a miracle that a girl “as starved as” me has such amazing results, she was stunned !! Thankfully I don’t need to go to the hospital because of these results. YIPPEE

#edtwt collar and shoulder bones </3 I feel like they should be way more visible :c

Good morning #edtwt c: I have my meetings with the clinics later .. I’m so scared :c I hope everyone has a calm morning. Any plans? <3

────୨ৎ──── .✦ ݁˖ #edtwt c: .ᐟ.ᐟ do my safe food Bingo <3

#edtwt Just got my official diagnosis for PTBS, Anorexia and depression :c the first clinic says I’ll have to stay for 6 months.. I’m so scared. I cried a little during the talk :c

I can’t sleep :c second clinic spoke very clearly about my blood results and said that they’re not good at all, that they show that my liver is starting to digest itself and that it’ll all fall soon. He said I might have a few weeks left and that I need help now :c I’m scared :c

#edtwt I made the step and called the clinic and they officially put me on the list :c since I’m critical, it’ll be pretty soon that I’ll be admitted so yeah :c I’m gonna spend a few hundreds on making my room pretty c:

Coping with online shopping >>>> c:

#edtwt I just spent 600€ on my coping mechanism for the clinic </3 sailor moon proplicas I’m weak for you :c SOOO EXCITED for them to arrive AAAAA

#edtwt by the way, I’m sorry if I’m no longer posting much :c I’m scared I’ll trigger myself when I look at my phone during my time in the clinic (since I don’t think they’ll forbid phone usage a lot) I’ll definitely send updates and everything and how my room looks though c:

#edtwt I’m so huge omg </3 I swear I don’t get why everyone wants me in the clinic when im not even that small :c (Not a pretty bc cause apparently people like to sell our pics ;c)

#edtwt my brother is visiting me rn and I literally had to ask him to leave after only 2 hours because I fell asleep mid conversation :c I’m so sad

Gmmm #edtwt c: any plans for today? My proplicas are arriving later and I’m so excited aaaaa >.<

My figure arrived c:

#edtwt feeling huge again :c at least my parents aren’t home so I can eat whatever I want without being judged </3

#edtwt morning c: going to the market today, finally getting to go outside again </3 I feel like I gained but scale says I have been maintaining at BMI 13 (37.7kg) so I I’ll try to calm down c:

#edtwt staying at a family friend’s the next two days c; super happy! Still maintaining at 37.7kg (I’ll never get out of this hell ig)

#edtwt Dinner at 15:43 c; like 160 cals? ✨

I love almost fainting all the time #edtwt