*First day as a marriage counselor Have you guys tried communicating with Top Gun gifs

Depressed Artificial Intelligence is called a Sighborg.

Single people: TWSS Married people: TWIJS

Anyone else hate the 👍🏻response or is it just me?

I can’t wait for Betty White to like pull back her face and be the terminator or something underneath.

Do you stop the microwave with one second remaining or are you mentally stable?

*cartwheels into wood chipper*

It’s been decades! Could some one PLEASE tell me what “ring around the collar” is?

I’d go through so many F150’s if I was a storm chaser.

The Giuliani show jumped the shark a long time ago. It makes sense it was canceled.

The weather dude said thick again. He also said juicy. I just…can’t. You’ve all ruined words.

Just once I wanna see a runner cross the finish line and light up a smoke.

Ecstasy was patented in 1913 as a diet pill.

Yes, I'm a lot. You bitches are a lot too.

I'm sorry I didn't take you serious but you didn't add motherfucker to it