A key party but it’s a bowl full of hand sanitizer

8PM TONIGHT!! #IsolationComedy on Twitch features these amazing comics! Christian Van Wade, Colton Dowling , @hollipooop , @bobby_segovia , @ScottSticker , @Derekomedy , Ky Krebs , Shannon Mugrage , Marijuano Garcia , @_holly_hart_ , Martin henn, & @MichaelCPriest !!!

I’ve eaten so edibles lately I can’t tell how high I am but I can tell how dry I am.

94% of US public school teachers regularly spend their own money on school supplies. when was the last time you heard about a police officer having to buy their own bullets?

One thing my mom showed me is that you can be strong, independent AND live with crippling depression.

if nothing else, the election results will determine if I buy a playstation or a gun

35% of Latino voters are gonna be forgotten as fuck #LatinosForTrump #ElectionResults2020 #ChingaTuMaga

Gonna be reciting musings tonight on SURE THING 930 pm @ Fallout Theater tickets almost sold out so get you some!

BLABBERMOUTH.NET Ironic - this guy put more harmful shit in his body than he could comprehend. But THIS is where he draws the line.

America love true crime stories. America love fictional crime stories. Cruella wants to skin 100 dogs and y’all still want to know that makes her tick.

Heckuva lineup next Tuesday 8/3 7:30pm in Lakeway!! Come out to HOPS & THYME (Lakeway TX) for food and free laughs !! Guest host @hollipooop with @DemiBinarielle @chefrey_bogart Marijuano Garcia Joe Faina Mary Helen McCarthy & more

Friday we’re going to make fun of Sisqo’s follow up to the Thong Song and more!! Incredible comedians! Music videos!! Angelina Martin @bobby_segovia Ashley Sharma! Friday at Fallout Theater is hot! Stick around for SURE THING !

Come check out Trace and I RADIO COFFEE & BEER Thursday at 9 Come check out Mixtape Friday at 8pm Fallout Theater

Facebook and Instagram blipped! Finally I’m free!! Free to tell you about this dang show!! Come see Mixtape 10.15 8pm Fallout Theater #facebookdown #instagramdisabled

I checked in with Twitter the same way I check in with God. Only when I’m alone in an emergency.

When they were reading the verdict, he looked nervous. Sweaty. Real Ku Klux Klammy. #KyleRittenhouse

I’m really proud of the flyer I made this month.

I don’t have a moral compass but I do have a righteous sextant.

Next week the South Austin Comedy show RETURNS at The Far Out Lounge 6/19, 7 pm, TIX: bit.ly/southatxcomedy4