I love working w/elderly clients bc they gas me up & do whatever they want. Took us forever to find my guy in the nursing home today & they thought they lost him but then he rolls in (his wheelchair) like he owns the place & spends the next 30 mins trying to convince me I’m 20 💕

So what’s the plan here? No news, journalism, criticism, or human-made art? That’s the utopia?

I’ve hit a milestone as an attorney much sooner than I thought I would. I have been dealing with the most insane pro se defendants & shit is getting weird. Like, we can give them all the leniency afforded to pro se parties (rightfully so), but it’s not gonna help these guys 🤡

Business guy: who’s in charge of “assholes” - you or HR? Me: it depends Biz: on the asshole? Me: the type of asshole

Last year a lady side swiped me on the highway in downtown Cincinnati, & ppl assumed I would have called the cops or made a report bc I’m a lawyer, but I knew there was no way to prove it was her, so I was like “girl if ur good I’m good” & we peaced out, did NOT tell my insurance

I hate this so much 💛💛

HOW TO HIRE GOOD ATTORNEYS: Look at their LSAT score and their knowledge on the Rule Against Perpetuities. Those are really the two biggest indicators of success as a lawyer.

The Starting Line about to blow up again like it’s 2002

33 digits of pi

Me every night, trying to convince my brain to do the sleep thing

Business guy: if we accidentally overcharged the client, do we need to give the money back? Me: yes Biz: need a “no” Me: you could credit their account Biz: please be reasonable

Ofc I want to hear what admin law attorneys think about the Chevron sitch, but only after I hear from the immigration attorneys specifically.

This election is a joke. I literally don’t know a single person who supports either candidate.

“why do you have a gap in your resume” idk why is there a gap in your staff. worry about that

It is so much harder than I realized to break out of one area of law & into another. Feeling more stuck than ever rn 😞😞

This doesn’t show dominance. It’s a sign you are a corporate slave, a service provider, someone dependent on a paycheck, a bonus, a performance review, customers. Ignoring emails shows dominance

“I can make deals with the Devil because my dick’s bigger” I am gasping for air

We knew she was a master lyricist but nobody can talk to me ever again after this

ughhhhh i didn’t fix my entire life this weekend FUCK

I’m at a point where I’m panicking & crying every night bc the stress of my job at my current firm, & I just feel like this can’t be normal 🤡🤡