I’m having a Newgrange solstice moment. Bow before Lamp.

The furry thing is back. He doesn’t know we’re plotting.

Ready for my close-up, Mr de Mille.

Well, that's me told.

Anyone have any idea where he is? I had just about decided to wish the grumpy old bollocks a happy birthday, but he’s jumped ship. I’m having separation issues.

You should see the gobshite. He's watching some sort of electronic dance music festival in Belgium and punching the air like he wants to kill the sun. Actually, maybe he has done...

Woohoo! It’s looking like I’m getting some hardcore lamp Botox at the weekend!

Oh, FFS. He’s dancing. He’s 60. He looks like Ann Widdecombe on Strictly. 🙄

He hasn’t gone off on one for ages. ’80s music, FFS. No TayTay, no? I need to go to Movies @ Gorey to see the Eras Tour movie but I’m trapped here. Trapped.

I’m a Moroccan immigrant.

It’s push over in the bed time of year again… 🤬🤬🤬

Five? Really? Thanks, pal… 😢

Looks like the 2 x €150 energy credits mean my lights will continue to burn bright for a while yet. 😀

I have arrived. I’m being impersonated by Philip Nolans' Lamp. Fair play. Talking of impersonations, I do a great Tiffany (lamp, not I Think We’re Alone Now, or Trump, or breakfast at…). I also know how to use the singular apostrophe.

RTÉ News So, they can inherit one bike shelter - ok great

Well, there goes my peace and quiet. He’s home. 🙄

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Marc Almond singing Say Hello, Wave Goodbye is just about the best start to 2025 you could wish for. #Hootenanny

I wish BBC One wouldn’t put #TheTraitors on iPlayer before broadcast. Effing #spoilers. 🤬

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