The made up fear that k-3 teachers are indoctrinating kids into being gay is so wild to me as a person who hasn’t been able to indoctrinate her pre-K class into learning the days of the week in order despite all her best efforts.

Did you “do a thing” or did you put $50k down on a house?

Iykyk #RoeOverturned

I need #Beyoncé to personally apologize to my ACLs. I don’t have the knees for this. It’s audible gay chaos and all I will be listening to only this for the rest of the summer. #RENAISSANCE

One time MuscleBear84 retweeted one of my tweets, 99 people liked it, and I considered doing a “wow this really blew up” tweet

Being a woman is wild because you have to carry a weapon to be outside but also you want it rhinestoned.

Quiche is omelette pie

Wild to watch a group of people who cling so tightly to the electoral college complain about a vocal minority having control over the majority.

To mess up Patti Labelle’s teleprompter and monitors on Pride Sunday is a hate crime. #BETAwards

I hope we all take time today away from Kyle’s divorce rumors to enjoy our bi-annual single hot dog on a plate with no bun 🇺🇸🌭 #RHOBH

I don’t dress for the male gaze I dress for the male gays.

Watching McCarthy lose speakership

I got to meet Kathy Najimy and tell her she makes everything she’s in better and that I won a costume contest as her and that I liked the gymnastics show she was in and we couldn’t remember the name. Kathy, it’s “Make it Or Break it” and thank you for being a national treasure.

Shallots are just gay onions

There is a Beanie Baby to Stanley cup collector pipeline and we’re not talking about it.

Whoever invented turkey stuffing really thought “let’s shove some old bread into a turkey and then serve wet bread with the dinner” and it turned out great somehow. Thankful for that person.

Catching up on the Kate Middleton news over a $24 salad at a sweet green in the suburbs of New Jersey just feels right.

The Kendrick/Drake beef is my husband’s “Scanovall” and I’m honestly so thrilled for him.

I would give up TikTok and literally all social media apps in exchange for an assault weapons ban and universal health care. But kids are still getting shot a school and going bankrupt from their hospital bills and I can’t even have my dumb little internet friends to cope with

If I send you this it means that was really dastardly of you #RHOSLC