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jake gyllenhaal logging on to twitter

Suing Jake Gyllenhaal for emotional damage on behalf of me and Taylor Swift because how THE FUCK am I supposed to emotionally recover from these lyrics???

jake gyllenhaal: “passing this phone to someone who has a sick need to give love and take it away.”

💀💀

r ……… u not….. embarrassed …………

THISBIS SO CUTEEEEE TAKE MY MONEY

#Yellowjackets is a fantastic show that reaffirms why I will only do shrooms with people I really, really like.

this was a bad idea …. i miss the city lmao

gwapaha jud nko oi …

just DA’d my fb lol let’s see how long this lasts

one more year!!!!!!!! sick of this place

Amber Heard sliced part of Johnny Depp's finger off, burned his face with a cigarette, shit on his bed, spit on him, withheld his medications, punched him and then played the victim in front of the entire world. He lost his job, but she didn’t. #AmberHeardIsAPsycopath

not your typical marites 💅🏼😌

i cannot do this rn #StrangerThings

Oh but I must cycle to work , use paper straws, limit beef consumption in order to reduce my carbon footprint?

SIKE!!! extended my contract 🥲