My friends are HILARIOUS

Genuine question… How would I send Miles an invitation to my wedding ? 👀

A NO FLY ZONE BABY!!! LETS GO Denver Broncos !!!!!!!!! 🧡💙👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

GET THAT GROOVE BACK BOYS!!! Denver Broncos

Up since 230… partner sick as fuck with a high fever and I’ve run out of Clorox wipes. Send help…

Someone stole a bunch of my shit in Dec… all my shoes gone. Well except for the left shoe of some of my Nikes. Which is weird lol needless to say. I no longer have black air maxes 😭😭😭

Am I allowed to honeymoon in Puerto Rico? Cause, I low key want to…

Kristi Noem: “We can't trust our government anymore.” CNN: “You are the government.” Noem: “Yes, that’s what I’m saying.”Aaron Rupar (2026)

Asking questions about a literal child sex ring and deflecting with remarks about stocks, is weird… right?

What do you mean you aren’t drunk at 830 making a shrimp boil on Valentine’s Day!?

My sea food boil was too spicy for everyone and I’m the only one that ate it… lol 😂

I feel like player/coach would really understand how much I miss Tomas. I’ve been finding his stuff that he had his around the apartment this week and man… I’m sad, but also so glad he knew how loved he was… my sweet soul dog…

“Just the tip. Just for fun. Just to see if I can win a gold medal.”- Conner Hellebuyck( while making the save, probably)

This is actually how I get ready in the morning

Brb, trying to convince everyone that i absolutely CAN dance to “Nothing else matters” by Metallica as a first dance song…

I was woken up last night with the terrible news surrounding that orange bag of slime looking MF-er and all I had to say is… IF HE AND HIS CABINET ARENT IMPEACHED I’M GOING TO BE SO DISAPPOINTED…. That’s all. FDT

Imagine keeping me up all hours of the night since you’ve moved in and trying to start shit with us because of it happening to you once. Got me all the way fucked

My happy meal did NOT come with a croc and I am UPSET. 😢 McDonald's this hurts worse than when they don’t add extra pickles like I asked for…