This 5am wake up is rough

Clearly this cat Oscar has a schedule he likes to keep 😂

There are WAY to many screaming kids in the mall today

Way way to many

This 🙌🏼

When you finally have enough point for a free one you go big 😂

Prescription sunglasses really are worth it

Game changers

It’s the small things

Happy Sunday

I work today ugh 😑

Oscar hates the cat food the picky shit so today I have to find something HRH will like 🤦🏽‍♀️

I also discovered he likes to whip everything off every surface at 5 am

#selfiemode

Today some gross smarmy man asked to have his wife’s hair done
I directed all of my questions at her she was silent he was mad I talked to her not him
He snapped at me to talk to him and not her

Sir I think you have made a grave error

I thought it was weird I was craving KD and then I remembered it’s 420 and it is all making sense

I so love when the weather changes 12 times before noon

Happy Caturday I am happy to report I did not die from this little gremlin in my sleep He did however wake me up at 5 am for love 💕

Omg what if this new cat is a gremlin

Ok whew it isn’t midnight yet

Or was it after dark

Oh man

If I type a K my predictive text suggests Krispy and next it does Kreme as a prediction

I feel seen

1st time since coming to us as a wild feral a year and a half ago that I’ve pet her or touched her. All her siblings have been homed, she was the holdout but I knew I’d crack her 💕 so glad we got this breakthrough on video.

Block they know what they did 😂

I’m in love 😻

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you an honorary member of the Tortured Poets Department, Oscar Sam Swift

Something fantastic is happening tomorrow and I am so excited I may not sleep 😂

I’d like to take tap dance classes!

Or

I’d like US to take tap dance classes!

Follow me for more ways to passively scare your partner

Thank you to whoever sent the bag of cat treats and bag of food

We have some incoming floofs tomorrow so I’m grateful ☺️

I can not do what I do without all of you 💕

All sorted whew 😅 I guess I’ll have to pay the government myself

I need to either claim the cats as dependents or they need to get jobs