When the sweet nectar of that Delta SkyClub rose hits..

Corded leaf blowers just make no sense to me

My lady hotter than urs prob alicia

We were never allowed to use the dishwasher growing up unless it was a big party so when I use it now for not that I feel naughty

'My Dinner with Andre' (1981)

Give people their flowers when they are here, not at their funeral.

I’ll really eat anything.. kind of a garbage disposal at this point in a way. But there’s one thing I really need cooked well or it’s just really nasty to me… and that’s string beans. Idk why but those suckers really are nasty if they ain’t cooked perfect

Basterebbe dire: "Punizione di Pirlo" ⚽️ #GoalOfTheDay

Everyone you meet always asks if you have a career, are married or own a house; as if life was some kind of grocery list. But nobody ever asks if you are happy. - Heath Ledger

Day in the life alicia

Fucking knew it

Line of the weekend “Just go and get 30$ worth of hot dogs”

Try not to talk things out of existence

*BREAKS ONE GLASS* Deep cleans entire kitchen

Three broken glasses in a week

All the people posting heavily about the writers strike are the ones going to the movies this weekend hahaha

Preworkout just makes my ears itch that’s about all it does

Everybody's got real estate knowledge apparently lol

Risotto doesn’t need steak or chicken or scallops on top of it you animals

Most effective pre-workout is weed, don't try to change my mind