oh so when you put pieces together you’re “really into jigsaw puzzles” but when I, Victor Frankenstein,

Not me obsessively re-reading the #mswl of a dream agent closed to queries for what feels like forever.

Pick a number between zero and 48 how many old toothbrushes do you keep under the sink for cleaning you rarely do.

Why do I keep forgetting what an emotional rollercoaster writing a book is? Like I’m up, I’m down, it’s trash, it’s perfection all in the span of 20 minutes

Do you measure garlic with your heart or are you a soulless monster.

I loved the absolute heck out of this. open.spotify.com/show/0LwynFnRB… #harleyquinnandthejoker

Dear every business ever - I bought something from you. Please don't make me want to NEVER BUY FROM YOU AGAIN by emailing me every day.

I want a secret drawer just for me and it's full of tape and scissors. #iykyk

Breaking my rule about only buying trade paperbacks because #dragonage and #varrictethras. #biowareproblems

Hard same.

I appreciate everyone including their rankings, but this is the correct ranking: 1) Emma 1) Mansfield Park 1) Northanger Abbey 1) Persuasion 1) Pride and Prejudice 1) Sense and Sensibility

Sometimes labeling is hurtful. Sometimes it is accurate.

I remember being told that good email etiquette was to never respond with thanks for something, because it’s just extra email. Meanwhile, I save almost every email where someone goes out of their way to thank me genuinely for my help or my time.

"She was under the Earth’s crust, dungeon-deep in self pity." #amwriting

My husband said he didn’t want any more Girl Scout cookies and I took that to mean I could hide a box of Samoas in my closet.

There are two wolves inside of you and they’re both really depressed.

I have an extensive jar collection and just zero plans for them. I can't throw any away. What if they're needed in my post-economic collapse pantry.

I think I’m over it. Come and find me on Tumblr or TikTok or just email me like the elder millennial I am.