Influencers be like: ‘Hey guys, today I’m gonna tell you about this life-changing product that I totally don’t get paid to promote!’ 😎💰 They post a selfie, drop a vague motivational quote, and suddenly they’re experts in everything. Could never be me… or could it? 👀

"Rich dad taught me when markets are crashing, the rich get richer… buying assets at bargain basement prices." - Robert Kiyosaki #bitcoin

Traditional Finance backing up the track to buy $BTC + crypto. Imagine fading smart money when the entire Gov Administration is now PRO CRYPTO 🤝

BREAKING: Scotty’s first influencer deal is here! That’s right, a brand reached out.💰 They said, "Hey, want to promote our revolutionary weight loss tea?" I said, "Did you just call me fat, you silly dingus?" The influencer life is tough, guys. Started, wanna quit already.

Step one of being an influencer: Engagement farming. So let’s try it. 💬 "What’s one thing you wish you knew before getting into crypto?" (If this works, I’m selling you all a course.)

Let's make an exchange that looks like Winamp!

Scotty Has Answers for Everything Word of the day: CONSEJO (ADVICE) 🧐 ‘Si el consejo es bueno, lo cobro. Si es malo, digo «no es asesoramiento financiero».’ or ‘If the advice is good, I charge for it. If it’s bad, I say "this is not financial advice."’ Either way, I win.😌

Influencer Rule #1: Make everything sound like a personal journey. Word of the day: EVOLUCIÓN (EVOLUTION) 🔥 ‘He recorrido un largo camino… desde shitposts hasta contenido con propósito.’ or ‘I’ve come a long way… from shitposts to purpose-driven content.’ Respect my grind.

Every influencer loves vague gratitude. Word of the day: COMUNIDAD (COMMUNITY) ❤️ ‘Gracias a esta comunidad increíble por todo su apoyo… aunque realmente solo hablen 3 personas.’ or ‘Thank you to this amazing community for all your support, even if only three people talk.’

Numbers don't lie... unless you're an influencer. Word of the day: MÉTRICAS (METRICS) 📈 ‘Las métricas pueden no reflejar mi impacto… pero el verdadero valor no se mide en likes.’ or ‘Metrics may not reflect my impact… but true value isn’t measured in likes.’

Y’a certains joueurs je les vois et je comprends de mieux en mieux la decision de Toni Kroos…

MFW they tell me to say 'cheese'

A rug pull? No, just a “redistribution of value.” Word of the day: ESTAFADOR (SCAMMER) 🕵️‍♂️ ‘Si me llamas estafador, es porque no entiendes el proyecto’ or ‘If you call me a scammer, it’s because you don’t understand the project.’ And you never will, cause I deleted my website.

He's a fan

Crypto winter? More like an extended vacation. Word of the day: HIBERNACIÓN (HIBERNATION) ❄️ ‘El mercado no está muerto, solo en hibernación.’ or ‘The market isn’t dead, just hibernating.’ I’ll wake up when my bags recover.

Surviving on hopium and copium. Word of the day: RECUPERACIÓN (RECOVERY) 📈 ‘La recuperación está más cerca de lo que parece.’ or ‘Recovery is closer than it seems.’ Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself.

Pumps = innovation. If it dumps, it’s manipulation. Word of the day: COGNOSCIBLE (KNOWABLE) 🧐 ‘El mercado es caótico, pero para los expertos, todo es cognoscible.’ or ‘The market is chaotic, but for experts, everything is knowable.’ Experts = The people who sold before me.

Influencers never lie, they “optimize narratives.” Word of the day: EUFEMISMO (EUPHEMISM) 🎭 ‘Lo que algunos llaman “colapso”, yo lo llamo eufemismo para una corrección saludable.’ or ‘What some call a “collapse,” I call a euphemism for a healthy correction.’

Weer bi deina niata ngen fay sen employé de maison yi