"Tayls, we've picked up something on the mic that we believe is Declan Rice speaking to you"

You’re running out of time to buy a loaded up Macbook at 0% interest and waiting for Klarna to go bankrupt.

This should be a playoff for who goes down to the championship

Will say even as a Gooner who absolutely hates the man That Ange quote is top 5. So, so cold

‘So you decided to take that promotion to head of operations in London so your salary went from £90,000 to £122,000?’ ‘That’s right Dave’ ‘But now your take home is less because of the UK government?’ ‘That’s right Dave.’

Incredible what you can achieve if you just channel an entire country’s wealth into running a football team

Amazing really that my landlords (elderly couple) will likely get a £200 winter fuel payment while I work full time, can barely afford the rent and rising living coats and don't.

Vannaka on tutorial island after he teaches you how to use melee

Poor lad is about to find out tackles like these are now red cards

Forest are mad unlikeable as a club. What they did to palace was so low

“Sanchez huh?” Lemme see your papers

Literally nobody: Pedro Pascal when he starts to feel anxious:

You think the lads playing in the Conference for Fleetwood looked at Vardy and saw a 100 goal PL striker?

My striker was hunting down a 15 year old so he could stat pad on the weekend. Different.

“We’re cracking down the holding in corners”

Gunna have to listen to this bullshit and lies for 2 weeks now cause of a 40 yard free kick. Will be from our own moron fans too. Fuck off.

So you're saying that even though this van is in England and has English papers, it will never be an English van? Interesting 🤔

That was last week Richard, this week the law interpretation has changed.