The day after July 4th, I'm full of grease and booze, and not full of shit I usually am #July5th

I refuse to do the #10yearchallenge because I don't want to see the hope I had back then.

"You have nice eyes" is the pickup line for 2020.

Hey Paul F. Tompkins. Rewatching a lot of old Speakeasy episodes. You're a great interviewer.

I'm going as Donald Duck for Halloween... Sailor shirt and hat and no pants.

You know what happens when you assume... Everything comes out alright. #almostfamousquotes

I bought a bag of sunflower seeds. I realized it's 1% edible food and 99% busywork #mindblown #learningnewthings

Feeling nostalgic for floppy discs. 3.5", not the 5.25" abomination #floppydiscs #oldtech #computing

I can't wait for new gen punk to beat up Imagine Dragons and The Lumineers

Working on the first hangover of #2018 #HappyNewYear2018 #HNY #HNY2018

You ever wonder if the Boston Tea Party was just a drunken frat boy prank and over time was portrayed as a political act against the British? #History

Never stop believing, unless it's Santa, then you gotta grow up.

Did they play a snippet of The Getup Kid's cover of New Order's "Regret"on the broadcast of the Super Bowl? #thegetupkids

There's a lot of dry gin. What does wet gin taste like?

Spinner wheels were the adult version of fidget spinners #Cars

Haven't had a Pop Tart or a smore in a while. 2 birds with 1 stone. Boom #goals #Olympics

Once, before smartphones happened I met a guy who had the same exact flip phone and we bonded hard. #thingsweredifferentthen

I'm an adult and I should have tater tots for every meal.