Free kick teckers!!! Brap Brap Brap!!!! 50/50 shoulder challenge- got into a scrap. Skinned Craig ward cos he is crap. Hambone couldn’t catch me- fat useless bap. Maradonna 7- sprout got swag.Then I got a penalty and hit the corner flag!

I will never forgive Drakeford!

Denim condoms in the back pocket! Who’s coming to Bar Risa? #seenmedidyou

You are a warrior for enduring that. Drakeford save us

official updated mandate. #voteforlez

#voteforlez

Official apology It has become apparent that The Egg is fed up of the vids, tweets and poems that have built his profile the past 5 years. Sorry Egg. Your seven days breathing space starts tomorrow. #dragonhouse

get into work. staffroom small talk focusing on the breezy weather. didn’t realise i worked with a set of walking fannys. a man of my stature doesn’t feel cold. i embrace it. walk down shop in shorts an sliders when it’s -1. shadow box wind when it pipes up. i don’t give a fuck.

Fucking hell- lots of arachnid lust in Maesteg these days! The thirsty spiders patrolling the waterspout. 8 legged lust

Why is it considered harassment to talk about sex in the workplace but not to children at school?

interview. i stare in mirror with menacing smirk. jab at self with venom. dip. slip. bounce. go get em tiger. enter old place of work. back to claim my throne. clean slate cos new store manager. nail interview by hooking self in jaw to prove my iron chin. gaffa was impressed.

As a demonstration of solidarity with Matt Le Tiss, I too have told the bbc I’m not presenting Songs of Praise tomorrow. Fuck the illuminati

Buzzing of joop up town. Edgar must be near

Just spoke to Herbie. He said ‘bring your Umbrella Gibbons, cos it’s gonna be raining blows! ‘

“Guff I’m tamping-Burgers , burgers,burgers!’ ‘STFU Hembs I’m a changed man now! I’m rebuilding my body from the inside out!’ #chiaseeds

The egg scrubs up well fair play. He had too much joop on tho. Tanned steel advised him ‘ Egg, a fragrance should be discovered ,NEVER announced!’

Love people watching on hols. You can always guarantee to find a 45 year old bloke in full football kit at eve meal. (No offence egg). Then the other classic, classic golas, socks up to the chest, bermuda shorts and a checked shirt.

First the illuminati shut my account. Then I went to jail. Then I lost my password. But after 2 long years…. I’M BACK BABY! Lots has happened..Neil Arthur is an absolute machine, Tanned Steel has since retired, Gavin Ronan has grown 2 inches but Gibbons tats are still wild!

Richard Seldon- had the best hair in Caerau. 7” spikes, Tommy Hilfingerer coat from PT market and could do party tricks with a pack of Frosties. If you know. You know. Legend

See this Instagram video by @flippinggoated instagram.com/reel/DKO4gYbMt… ‘The dog can crack on!’ Hot dogs for tea boys