John Wineland (@john_wineland) 's Twitter Profile
John Wineland

@john_wineland

Author, Speaker, Spiritual Intimacy teacher

ID: 941066832299024384

linkhttp://www.johnwineland.com calendar_today13-12-2017 22:06:31

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They did something that hurt you! What do you make it mean? Where in you does this meaning emerge from? How do you act from that place? Does it serve love? Here’s the most important question. What else could you make it mean? Would that serve love?

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An easy way to avoid the pain of growth, loss and vulnerability that comes with deep intimacy is to blame You know you are off track if you are villainizing or blaming your partner (or ex) Every time you do, you cement to karma only to repeat it later

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The Masculine tool (for all of us) is awareness Learning to use that tool is the essence of Masculine practice The Feminine tool is energy. Learning to use that tool is the essence of Feminine practice. Of course, using them together is the pinnacle of all practice

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Please! Build a community around you that in equal ways, validates your humanity and magnificence. While ruthlessly challenging your narrative about love, the world and your relationship with it. Your development as a human being depends on it!

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Here’s the Deal They are all trauma bonds on some level That is how God in her infinite wisdom set us up to heal The problem is not the trauma bond Its that we don’t recognize it for what it is—the sacred portal where, if we face ourselves head on—everything can change

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In your 20s you don’t know shit and you don’t really care In your 30s you don’t know shit, but you think you do In your 40s you start to learn some shit, but it doesn’t really help In your 50s you’re like oh fuck, I really really don’t know shit, now what?

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The more alive the wounds in your relationship, the more conscious communication techniques are essential Without a container of conscious, reflective listening, empathy and validation, the karmic momentum of the wounds takes over… And we cut each other, over and over

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It’s Time to Find Your Warrior Heart Its Time to Own Your Wounds and Transmute Them to Gifts It’s Time to Feel What You Honor Above All Else It’s Time to Set Your Compass Squarely There And to Release All That Takes You Off That Path

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Our attachment to the expectations we have of our lovers The roles we demand they play for us The covert contracts we impose for them to do the “thing” that makes us feel safe and whole Choke the possibility of sacred union and instead become the cage our hearts wither in

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You can not understand your woman’s rage without feeling how she was, for centuries—punished for her magic, brutalized for her body, and essentially made property to serve power’s agenda All of that is still in her cells

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You can’t understand your man’s fear without understanding how he was for centuries—taken from his family, enslaved, beaten, and forced to kill his fellow men to serve other men’s thirst for power All of that still lives in his heart We all got fucked by the patriarchy

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It is a truly liberating and humbling moment when we come face to face with just how much fear we carry in our bodies And how that fear impacts the ways we love. From that realization everything in love and life is possible Unfortunately, very few ever reach it

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No matter how much money you make or worldly success you create If you can’t lead yourself in the ways your heart and soul are demanding, you will feel a gaping void You will likely try to fill it with experiences, which will only make the hole larger The path is inward

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You can’t heal your childhood attachment wounds with any kind of meditation, love and lighting, embodiment or spiritual practice Stop trying You are hurting those around you with your delusion Those wounds need awareness, excavation, and full expression to clear

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The most important practice in conflict is: before you open your mouth in a difficult conversation Ask: are you safe within yourself? Can you feel the eternal and spacious YOU beneath the swirl of fears and emotions? Anything you say from there will have depth and impact

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You can’t reject the little boy/girl and expect the King/Queen or the Warrior/Seductress We need to embrace the totality of our beloveds. Not just the parts that turn us on or make us feel safe Or we need to let them go to find someone who can love all of them

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Childhood consciousness demands “I need you to do something to keep me safe” Adult consciousness asks “How can I be the safety this moment requires” Learning to move from one to the other is the great relational journey of our lives

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Please stop throwing around terms like “wounded masculine” or “wounded feminine” We are all fucking wounded. The wound is not a problem Our unconsciousness or unwillingness to excavate, feel and transmute it into love and liberation is

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Awareness is the key to all behavior change The catalyst to nervous system regulation The gateway to perceiving people and the world as beautiful and filled with magic Master it