Markets today: left foot green, right hand red, and the floor is your new portfolio 🤪

CrowdStrike $CRWD and CoreWeave $CRWV announce a partnership:

a haunted house but it’s just having to finish writing your WIP before starting a new one.

Finally, I’ll live long enough for my “buy and hold” strategy to work.

$AAPL introduced its iPhone Pocket, calling it "a beautiful way to wear and carry iPhone." ...are you in?

a haunted house but its an entire book written without oxford commas

The White House saying October CPI and jobs data might never be released is kind of like me pretending my car’s check engine light isn’t on. 🙈

The Winklevoss twins investing in Zcash—because if Facebook taught them anything, it’s never share your data or your ideas.

They put up the holiday plaza. New location.

Oh look, the stock market and I have something in common

That's cute

When the market closes red and you immediately reach for the fridge cig.

server: do you want grated cheese? me: yes of course thank you server: say when me: okay … server: (looks at me) me: (says nothing) … server: (raises eyebrows at me) me: (still says nothing) server, whispers: I’ve been waiting my whole life for this moment.

Jensen Huang after NVIDIA beats earnings:

Just once, I’d like to know what it feels like to carry 5 or less things

I just saw a woman leaving work with a roller lunchbox. I repeat: a roller lunchbox. she was wheeling her tiny little lunchbox behind her like a suitcase. that’s it, I just thought someone else should know.

If you have the mind of an #investor, you'll note that there’s a company behind each of the products on your #Thanksgiving table. In this article for MarketBeat, I explain why higher prices could lift the earnings and the stock prices of several companies.

I am driving home with 7 Starbucks drinks right now. the next time I wonder why someone is driving slow AF and basically stopping to make turns I will assume this is why and have empathy instead of blind rage.