they should invent a narcan for pizza rolls

every establishment should let you rent shoes

Orenthal you glad I didn’t say banana?

one of the barrels in a double barrel shotgun is for making whiskey

can't wait to see who'll die today!

me when i post something edgy then check to see if any niche micro celebrities unfollowed:

but you have to admit it, juice was a killer nickname

pickup truck? idk looks pretty heavy

sewing a quilt out of twigs and wrappers

if your gf can't walk and has no legs and eats dirt and lives in the ground that's not your gf, that's a worm

it's technically not a crime for a football player to kill his whore gf

Satan took his memorabilia back today

i know he's up there riding a white bronco into the sunset

not quite enough evidence yet to convince me that cancer is the one who killed OJ

bro there are 18 slugs within (3) miles of your location

every porn bot i block brings me closer to enlightenment

the only thing cooler than not caring about something is caring about something

egg salesmen: cheaper! buy the dozen!

wanting to kms because it's that time of month again (when the subscription services charge me)

you know the world sucks when someone as awesome as me has to feel suicidal