Self-reminder tweet to watch The Simpsons' "Homer At The Bat" to kick off BASEBALL SEASON HOLY SHIT IT'S SO CLOSE I CAN TASTE IT 🌭 ⚾️ 🍺

😮

"[He's] forty, looks like he's thirty, thinks like he's twenty, and acts like he's ten." (:

Now that the Olympics are over it's college baseball until March Madness I guess

Hillary Duff's new album prolly about to surprise us all

No war with Iran

Lol Trump served the US men's hockey team HAMBERDERS

If Mamdani were smiling any less he'd have just looked at the two front-pages Trump's holding up

ERA

I've added so many ad-blockers, relays and extensions to my home Internet the streaming services don't know what the fuck to do. Now instead of ads they just stop my video and make me wait until it's loaded. The old Web has returned. Way better than watching insurance commercials

McCain's rolling in his grave. Quick, someone install a particle collider! Is anyone listening to me?

Second

Forgot that Christian rock fans don't tip

Pretty sick of the phrase "let me be clear" or any derivative thereof. Ahem, Democrats. You're clear. It's your words. Don't spell them wrong and we'll get it. Get something substantial done. Then, you'll be clear. Clear?

#ATOBTTR

Also, bye Kristi! Next up: Pam! 😀

Hey fast food CEOs people don't care about how the restaurant looks they care about the value and quality of your food pass it on 😏

We'll never know

Holy shit once/if Jerk's gets their shit together it's about to change the Huntington game 😳