You can clearly tell which of our customers get their news from NewsMax and Info Wars 😞

Pretty sure the VHS copy of Dances with Wolves that we had growing up came from McDonald’s

Cause sometimes they need to be railed I guess 🤷‍♂️

It does my heart good to see someone else who has multiple copies of Raging Bull

It doesn’t even matter what the movie is. If it has THAT SPECIFIC WB logo on it, it’s a guaranteed banger

Feeling stressed, gonna pop a few of these to help me level out

Heading into Monday like

Nanobot: “(sigh) come on, stupid, it’s over there…”

What your parents call you after finding out what you were doing on 4/20

Ana de Armas, do you like muscle cars and comic books

Donut shop needs to calm tf down

I’d rather swallow a dozen AA batteries than listen to Taylor Swift’s new album, sorry

Arrested for promoting literacy 😔

Piss on the floor and cum on all of the doorknobs and handles, duh

Marvel Studios presents:
A film by David Lynch

My mother leaves this little dish with Dove chocolates on the counter for customers.
We literally just had a guy walk in, ask what they were, and then pop one in his mouth and eat it, wrapper and all, completely unfazed.

This fucking day, man

I think Toyota is a pretty name for a baby 😊

Same dude came back just now and wanted to know if we had a bolt that “wasn’t too big around or too long.” I literally sighed and asked him if there was a gas leak in his house, Jesus fucking Christ

Customer came in and asked for 400 pounds of “that one feed for calves… not that one I got a few weeks ago, but that other one… you know, not to sweet and not too high in protein.”

Like dude wtf are you talking about