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You smoke crack, don't ya? Go on! JUMP! 😩😩😩😩😩😩🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

If you don’t like Austin Powers movies, stay tf away from me. Cause wym you don’t know the “daddy wasn’t there” song!!?!!!

I’m just a sl*t for a good crab cake omggggg

I hope that God gives me a really soft landing at some point. I’m so tired.

Them premade meals from HEB be so fire

If my text has to send as an iCloud link, don’t even worry about it love

I kinda want to get lasik but the problem is all the eye doctors I know have glasses and that's kinda suspicious

Suge Avery was like OOoooohh I feel like saaaanginnn and ran to the juke joint to be like SISTAAAAAAAAA you’ve been on my Miiiiiiiiiind 🤣🤣🤣

Not having social media is cool and all (I guess) but certain jokes you just gotta know. If I randomly yell “YOU NEED TO LEAVE” I don’t have time to explain why that’s funny

The one you’re trying to do.

The chemical peel I just got burned so bad omg! Hopefully I have the skin of a baby seal in a few days tho 😌

Being sexually harassed.

Accident but yes.

Lowkey, why are photoshoots so embarrassing 🥲

That Drake and PARTYNEXTDOOR album is sounding better and better as the weather gets hotter outside 😂

For the love of god book T-Pain for the next Super Bowl

My coworker got demoted and still gets to keep his same pay and level. He’s PISSED. I’m trying to understand the problem. Less responsibilities with the same money wouldn’t bother me at all 😂

FINE, if nothing else 😍

My problem with fasting is why am I allowing myself to starve when McDonald’s is open and right down the street 😩