Me if a MF blow up my car:

Chris. “Tryna check me” bro got checked and he looked at the camera like this an episode of the office 😂

The replies

500 🏎 Y’all are too invested in celebrities’ lives. They don’t even know you exist.

Like finding just the pin of a live grenade

All day today

elon musk to donald trump at every meeting in the oval office: “you are in the epstein files. meet my 3 year old son”

They should make a beer that’s also an energy drink and also a cigarette and also has 50g of protein

some of y'all. not naming names

Anyone see a cybertruck and feel a little bad for it Its kind of sad its like seeing a pug struggle to breathe

Then you don’t know enough white people

her: babe it’s too hot 🥵 me:

If you’re basing decisions on our involvement in wars on the Bible I am sorry you are not fit to be a U.S. senator

Present fathers can’t relate

unfortunately i have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man

having a beautiful wife is probably way more of a flex than whatever car you drive or how much you made last year...