it’s expensive to be poor

Do you think Will’s mom got scared and made him move in with his Auntie and Uncle in Bel-Air?? #Oscar

I used to really care about April Fools Day, until I realized my whole life is a joke.

As a performer, I’m not sure I will ever understand why people see a “No” from a job as a valid reason to act an absolute fool in an audience. If anything, performers SHOULD know proper decorum when watching another show regardless of whether or not you booked that gig.

I almost forgot how it felt to have Beta Alanine coursing through my veins, clawing at my nervous system, making me want to rip my skin off. 😌❤️

This is the most important election of our lifetimes.

my neck, my back, my pussy, and my crack. long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony

a timeless classic

When you tryna put sheets on the bed

No Nut November is light work if you just edge yourself all month.

I almost forgot my annual retweet, Merry Christmas.

BREAKING NEWS: The UNKNOWN has escaped from the Willy Wonka experience in Glasgow, Scotland.

Merr Chrimmuh 🖤

…. you mean to tell me this crab ran AND gooned???

The skull on the back of the hand tattoo is the SAME as the mustache on the finger tattoo, but some of yall aren’t willing to talk about that…

so this how he went out huh… rip Duo