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Anxiety tip: Next time you cringe over some embarrassing moment you had years ago try to remember other people's embarrassing moments. You can’t can you? That’s because you’re the only embarrassing human to exist, everyone else is always thinking about how cringey you are.

Left a music festival right before gorillaz came on bc my seasonal allergies were acting up. Before you ask yes it is hard being the lamest person i know !

Always always always read the letters

Little miss drinks Philz at 2pm🥴

i think for me an important thing to have in a friendship is confidence that i can say completely insane shit and continue to receive affection

Not to be earnest on main but i am currently writing a love letter in a coffee shop on a lazy monday afternoon and possibly experiencing inner peace 🥺

No longer questioning why I don’t match w women on hinge. It is clear

Scorpio season baby

2 years ago I was so young. So free. So blissfully unaware of what a business model canvas was

New Year, New Me (im going to be worse somehow)

Ahead of the “hot girls have stomach issues” curve! Still a banger!

Gorgeous gorgeous girls aspire to get the same score on the LSAT as they do when they take the RAADS-R

Learning abt “commitment problems” in this ir class. Turns out my ex boyfriend wasn’t an asshole, just one of the brilliant poli sci minds of our time 🥰

The next man who chokes me during sex without asking is getting choked back. Wdym you don’t like it when someone else literally and unexpectedly has your life in their hands? Why so excited to do it to me then???

Skilled at: running trainings, training runs, and running train

You live in a time zone, I live in the moment 🤪

Whatever goats your throat 😌

Going to start dating using a standard two-prong security system. Vulnerability scanning (first dates) rapidly followed by penetration testing

I want to start a podcast w someone called Hype Cycle where we share 5 things that are currently exciting to us while riding stationary bikes

just giving a heads up that i am going to be making moves in silence. wanted to let everyone know that im going to be making moves, but silently. my moves will be quiet, but i will be making them nonetheless, despite the general low amplitude at which the moves will be made