At the ski resort, it's easy to spot the "trophy wives"—usually with a massive ring they still try to cram into their ski gloves. Priorities? #SkiLife #TrophyWife #SkiLife #TrophyWife #steamboatsprings

The perks of being short? A longer life, always looking great in photos, and a smaller torso makes your penis look bigger. Google it, there is no correlation between height and dick size. #shortpeople #comedy

Is it better to make out every morning for 5 minutes or "bang a guy once a year?" The choice hinges on passion vs. practicality... and avoiding chapped lips. Priorities, people. 😅 #NSFWComedy #DatingLife

Piercings: where do you put 'em when you’re short on real estate? For some, the options get… interesting. A surprising history lesson drops on a now-debunked signal. #piercing #awkward #piercing #awkward

Matt Newland's sentences that have never been said before! Lego Batman *should've* won an Oscar if raw sex appeal was the only metric? The bar is low, but who's arguing? And does Adrien Brody just win everything now? Seen this take before? #LegoBatman #Oscars

The choice is tough: ditch sunglasses forever, or rock them during intimacy? Some say it's an easy call—shades on, always. Apparently, it's a "cool thing to do." #WouldYouRather #Sunglasses

Mad Max survival: Would you grab the wheel or ride shotgun? The driver is target #1, but they also keep the whole operation alive. High stakes, high reward? #MadMax #MovieTrivia #DystopianFuture

AI stand-up comedy: It's all fun and games until the cyborg George Carlin starts "dwelling." That's when you know "our backs are against the wall." #AI #comedy #AI #comedy

An angsty Kirsten Dunst in Spider-Man 2? Maybe she says, "If a hamster can marry me, then an astronaut can too!" 😂 Peter Parker just can't catch a break. Seen this happen? #SpiderMan2 #KirstenDunst

Ever been *that* guy? Showing up to a beach wedding in Ohio in a black suit? Some people hustle to *not be owned* by Hawaiian shirts. #WeddingFail #Ohio #WeddingFail #Ohio

Confronted by a heckler who claimed to have "owned" him years ago, one comic admits to feeling a surge of pure, unadulterated hate. Some lines you just don't cross. Seen this happen? #comedy #hecklers

The only thing standing between us and AI taking over podcasts? Eyebrow piercings. Apparently, that's the key to survival in the robot uprising. "Your life is a lie!" #AI #podcast

Coldplay kiss cam + tech CEO = internet gold. All he had to do was play it cool! When's the last time a lizard person kept it cool, though? 🤣 #Coldplay #TechFails

Why is seeing a "bigger girl with a skinny dude" so aesthetically pleasing? Apparently, if they're goth, it's even better. It just makes some people happy, okay?! #relationships #dating #goth

Big Pharma's at it again? Apparently, weight loss meds come with a side of... neck lumps? Some side effects are just next level. #WTF #Health #WTF #Health

Remember when System of a Down was dropping truth bombs about aspartame in the 90s? Now it's microplastics and AI... Enjoy the superhero movies while we can. #nostalgia #conspiracy #SystemOfADown

Lima beans AND a comet? Some situations are just a lose-lose. Sometimes there's no easy way out, just a slow descent into... something. #comedy #humor

If Travis Kelce ever messes up, Taylor Swift's next album is going to be straight fire. The album cover will probably be flames. #TaylorSwift #TravisKelce

Sydney Sweeney is getting unnecessary flack for her American Eagle ad. The internet is accusing her of being racist for a simple denim pun. People need to relax; she's just selling clothes. #SydneySweeney #AmericanEagle

Ever heard someone slip, "I invited her whole family over for brunch just so I could dose everyone's orange juice with SKYRIZI"? Some things you just can't unhear. 😂 #SentencesThatHaveNeverBeenSaidBefore #Comedy #Skyrizi