I’m in my ‘watching big city girls fall in love with small town boys at Christmas while eating crisps and drinking wine’ era

Every year I think, “This time, I’ll be organised,” and every year I’m wrestling with sellotape at midnight on Christmas Eve. 🎅

Come on girls, only a few more days of slumming it with radox bubble bath until we get our soap and glory and lush sets. We can do this.

Happy ‘going out and spending £345 on a food shop and then ordering a takeaway cos you’re not allowed to eat any of it’ day

Happy “blitzing the house like Jesus himself is coming to do an inspection” day to all who celebrate

Shout out to all the mums putting in the 2am Christmas Eve shift to make sure everything is magical in the morning

Today is the day when traditionally your true love should give you 5 gold rings. So if they don’t, we riot.

What’s longer? A plank minute, a washing machine final minute, or the queue for the omelette station at the all inclusive?

Just realised I spent December saying, “It’s fine, I’ll sort it in January,” but now January me hates December me

I swear me washing machine eats socks. I’ve now got a drawer of singles like I’m running a dating app for footwear.

Millennials love a sourdough starter because we miss our tamagotchis

Ryanair be like: Flight out: 99p treat yourself Return: £876 you may return… but for a price

That sound though! 🍷✨ Is there anything nicer than a fresh bottle of wine being poured? I think not. And what better glass to have it in than one with the Liverpool skyline on? Absolute *gorge*. 😍

This is why I say I can’t live without my scouse bird diary. It’s true. Do you know how many hilarious thoughts and life changing ideas I’ve had just as I’m dropping off to sleep and too tired to write them down? scousebirdshop.com/products/scous…

Mother’s Day is NEXT weekend! 😂 Free delivery on all greetings cards, so get yours sorted now and make sure your ma gets the love she deserves! or you'll be off the roast guest list 💖 scousebirdshop.com/collections/mo…

Mother’s Day soon! 💖 Don’t leave it last minute—free delivery on all greetings cards, plus loads of mugs and cute local jewellery to make your ma feel dead special. Is she a 5-star ma? Does she love a posh cuppa? SORTED scousebirdshop.com/collections/mo…

The same police force who had to deal with the trauma of the Southport attacks is dealing with yesterday's incident. Releasing information about the driver early to try and avoid a repeat of the Farage riots was exceptional policing. Agenda free common sense.

Omg stop it right now! That dead cheap high street outlet website that I’ve told you about before has just got this green leopard print number in stock for £16.99! All sizes available at the mo - it’s a bit of us leopard print lovers! Link: tidd.ly/3G32V9d (affiliate)

Interesting because the Yonbo robot actually looks boss 🤔🙏🏻

This actually looks boss! The kids would love it! Yonbo.ai #ad This Chinese Robot Will End Your Kids’ Screen Addiction youtu.be/T5Zott0nfzk?si…