me trying to sleep at night: my brain:

i’m convinced everyone is pretending the substance was good bc that movie was absolute trash

crazy that my body cant tell the difference between answering a text and being chased in the woods

this superbowl is just like when the seahawks blew out the broncos & it’s just as much fun this time

Savannah is one of the only girl's names that's also a significant "biome"

proud fake job haver 🫡

i have a strong feeling i was the neighbor

Hey i just thought of some bullshit. Do you want me to say it to you

getting fomo from the conclave

I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women

love island is psychological warfare

when my friends are religious i pretend not to notice

august is technically summer but spiritually fall

why is it so embarrassing when someone asks you what the book you’re reading is about

love making Cream for dinner

i feel like she did this to spite me

whenever i see a wasp outside in the fall it’s like come on, read the room

all’s fair is so bad it’s good & i’m obsessed

hey U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement if you don’t want to get “run over” maybe get the fuck out of the road