We're unsure if two weeks of constant reporting is making our correspondents better reporters or driving them slowly insane. Anyway, these briefs were dropped off by a very sketchy looking individual this morning: #Bounceball #MarchMadness #PoisonPill #NationalLampoon

The following reports were filed from our break room, which has been taken over by our newest employee, Marco, along with his pack of rabid guard dogs. He swears the knives are just for show, unless we don't have his money. #Bounceball #MarchMadness #PoisonPill #NationalLampoon

After soaring high into the Envious Eight, the FL ATL Hooters have their talons full as they face off against the Wildcats of Manhattan. Will the Big Apple of the Midwest prevail over the woke birds of America’s penis? We’ll find out tonight! #Bounceball #MarchMadness #PoisonPill

After three exciting rounds of bounceball we have good ol’ fashioned dog fight on our hands. Typically, huskies would obliterate bulldogs, but these ‘Zags come equipped with filed claws, armor plating, and enough drool to drown a hippo. Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?

It's a classic battle of natives vs religion in this Erogenous Eight matchup. As long as the SDSU Aztecs don't take any sus looking blankets from the Creighton boys they should be able to get two birds stoned at once and pull out the still beating heart of this win. #Bounceball

The Hurricanes face a particular dilemma in this matchup because if they take down the easily toppled Texas power grid then the anal electrocution slaughtering guns go down too. We think the Longhorns will try to turn up the heat early but end up perfectly medium rare.#Bounceball

With 4 campus visits in 5 days, our intrepid field reporter submitted the following school profiles, along with $23,657 in suspect expenses. Sadly, NL does not cover elective plastic surgery, name changes, or personal loans from guys named Vin the Shark #Bounceball #MarchMadness

🏀In preparation for tonight’s big championship match, we thought we’d let the ladies behind the bounceball hero boys do the talking: we had a grandmother from each team write tonight’s briefs on the game. Cybil is a Husky Grandmother and this was her letter. To Whom It May

How high have gas fees been lately? #NationalLampoon #PoisonPill #GasPrices

So, you've heard about these meme coins, right? It's like playing the lottery, but instead of wasting money on tickets, you're investing in digital punchlines! 🤑🎰💸 *Checks notes* Breaking news: Gensler & Pepe struck it rich this week! 🤯⚡️ We contacted the esteemed Mr.

Pepe's Presidential Hop: National Lampoon Takes on the Internet's Favorite Frog (Stage lights come up as [redacted] walks on stage, wearing a trucker hat and a flannel shirt) [redacted]: So y'all ever heard of this frog, man? Pepe the frog? This little green dude, been hoppin'

National Lampoon proudly presents the following suggestions to the Kentucky Derby for future races. Jockeys, even though half the size of full grown humans, have twice the heart to get on the back of a 1,000 lb+ beast with no seatbelt. #NationalLampoon #PoisonPill #web3 #KyDerby

In honor of our favorite equestrian day of the year, we here at National Lampoon have the following to share with you all. #NationalLampoon #PoisonPill #web3 #KyDerby

Going woke means going broke. SouthPark special on Disney was really something else. Satire was spot on.

Make sure your Jelly of the Month memberships are current and you've already spent your holiday bonuses. Check the circuit breakers too! Don't want too much of a load on them...

Mogged is the new get Punked?