For those of you in need of COVID-19 Economic Impact Payments, but hadn't filed their federal taxes in 2018 or 2019, the IRS now has up a portal for non-filers! Fill out today! #COVIDー19 irs.gov/coronavirus/no…

Patrick the games should be on basic 24/7 with limited commercials #patriotism #nbcfail

Bob Costas, just another statistic. Victim of freak bidet accident. #CostasEye

Alas, my #CostasEye karma has struck. It is my turn to weep. #stye #sorryBob

"CBO Whiffs on Minimum Wage" feedly.com/e/miCn0F3i

"The Heathers, PPACA, Susan McGinnis-CBS, battling Kidney Cancer, and the Truth" feedly.com/e/tjk7D7VM

For the first time ever, Matthew McConaughey may not be the craziest one on stage. #Oscars2014 #TrueDetective

My Travoltified Name is Mackenzie Herdson! What's yours? slate.com/articles/arts/… #JohnTravoltaNames

At grocery store, I buy choc syrup, OJ & starter fire log. Cashier says 'mm that smells good.' #yourguessisasgoodasmine #yournoseokay?

Congrats to Michael Halpin + his wife MaryAnn on the arrival of their beautiful new son, Will! Thanks for your continued support, Mike! #twill

"Joke theft: Can a comedian sue if someone steals his material?" BTW #NSA, stop mining my twitter & stealing my jokes feedly.com/k/1gWekEp

"Shortage of labor by rejecting wage offers" feedly.com/e/HGqo6nrI

"Star Wars" xkcd.com/1477/

Welcome to @Twitter, President Donald J. Trump! One question: Does that username stay with the office? #askingforafriend

@hosse_2001 Teresa Thoensen By big deal you mean the straw poll itself or the decision to skip it?

@hosse_2001 Teresa Thoensen couple reasons: 1 - if you don't play, you can't lose. 2 - even if you win, it doesn't count...

@hosse_2001 Teresa Thoensen ... So if you then do poorly in the actual caucuses, that becomes the story.

When I travel I MUST have the window seat—you can’t beat the view. What do you prefer? cokeurl.com/travelvote #WindowSeatVote

Did you know aquamarine green see glass actually comes from old Coca-Cola bottles? #UnderTheSeaGlass cokeurl.com/SeaGlassTrivia

#MasterthePour