“You best start believing in ghost stories Ebenezer” “You’re in one!”

“You are without a doubt the worst Santa I’ve ever heard of.” “But you have heard of me.”

Oh Spirits! *** Not sure I deserved that *** I may have deserved that *** No, that one I deserved.

“You will always remember this as the day that you almost caught Jolly Old St. Nick!”

It’s all coming back to me now…

lol, lmao even

Maybe it shouldn’t

The French government is trying to assassinate my wife and nobody cares

2005 was closer to 1985 than we are to 1985

“Then, on the fourth day, he roped himself a couple of reindeer, lashed 'em together and made a sleigh."  "He roped a couple of reindeer."  "Aye. Reindeer."  "What did he use for rope?"

Scoreboard

“I know those bells. It's Santa.” “Santa Claus? I've heard stories. He’s been delivering presents to good girls and boys for millennia. Never leaves any witnesses.” “No witnesses? Then where do the stories come from, I wonder?”

Aww helll nahhh 🤣🤣 is blud really ded?? 💀💀💀 niggas be trippin fr ong

I will never get more than 50 likes on a post ever again

“So we stole all the presents from the Whos” “Uh huh” “And took them up to Mt. Crumpet” “Uh huh” “And we took all the ribbons, we took all the tags” “Uh huh” “We took all the packages, boxes, and bags” “Spit it out Towzer! I’m standing here like a damn fool saying, uh huh

Heroes do not spare their enemies.

It's time to hear a different viewpoint...

Tactics straight out of the Battle of Pelusium. We are Retvrning.