...Seriously, can I not go one friggin' day on the ECHOnet without some nobody attacking me?

Uhhh, I'm sorry, who are you? Some kid I didn't know I had? A disgruntled Hyperion employee I spat in the face of once? Help me out here, pal...

Rhys ain't brought me a hot dog in a while. Time to get the dog boy PA outfit...

Ha. I wish? Seriously? I dunno anyone wishin' for an illegitimate child. Well, Alexander dude, you sure are makin' it sound like you reaaaally want me to spit in your friggin' face...

Hey, 𝓐𝓵𝓮𝔁... Important question. You like hot dogs, kiddo? Like, really like 'em?

I'm wonderin' how that epoxy resin hot dog is doing... And my Rhys PA. And my body double. But mostly the hot dog.

Huh, where'd all the Rhys go... Or is that Rhyses? Rhysi? Pieces of Rhyses? Rhyses Cupcakes?

𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒋𝒂𝒄𝒌'𝒔 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕, 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒄𝒆. #blrp #borderlandsrp

Good morning to the epoxy resin hot dog only.

Yeah, very. Sorry, kiddo. Wait, no I’m not.

Amateur hour, geez. Everyone knows not to eat Pandoran roadside hot dogs, dum-dum. Why did I even employ you again?

What the hell is going on with our hot dog supplier? Company went bust? A skag meat scandal? Maybe I don’t wanna know.

Oh, of course it was friggin’ bandits! Least the dogs are okay though, that’s all that matters. An’ getting some better security out there. The hell am I paying these guys for…

Hm. Damn, what rhymes with Fiona…

Nah, if anything we need MORE lasers. That’s like, rule number 3 of Hyperion. [ He makes a face, distorting his mask ] 2 days?! Seriously? Gonna have to eat those vegan hot dogs no one wants at this rate. That or eat hamburgers… [ Shudders ]