first of all, bitch, ... Postmates Tender Greens What happened is that Postmates fucking sucks.

45<>41

In honor of Bob Kraft I'm heading to Chinatown for a handy. #Kraftjob

Tweet number two.

Are you KIDDING me, Orphan Black: Echoes?!? Tell me you guys're watching this... #PartsDevelopedInAnUnusualManner #tail #holyshitholyshit

"I'm Greek and I'm a dirty old man, and you look attractive." - said to Yahoo CEO at $YHOO's shareholder meeting • cnb.cx/12hUyuc

In Sports: Dying Kid In Houston Holding On Until Astros Develop Player Worth Meeting onion.com/1cOu6dt

Tim Cook meets with Chinese vice premier to "exchange views" on data security theverge.com/e/6802458

MORE: Royal Canadian Mounted Police warned people in downtown Ottawa to stay away from windows and rooftops: apne.ws/12bOmrp

Think twice about faking your resume » cnb.cx/1gavRV3

Hey Instacart ...for a company that's only thing is delivering groceries, you are terrible at delivering groceries. Had my first order tonight and wow did you manage to shit all over yourselves.

Alex DeLarge Forced To Step Down As Leader Of Droogs Amidst Allegations Of Sexual Misconduct trib.al/4l2WgNm