Tonight 7:00PM Ted Jones Comedy Show Anthony DeVito Maddy Smith @garyvider Daniel Simonsen The Official Shannon Fiedler Anna Roisman 🎟️🎟️🎟️ thestandnyc.com/shows/show/202…

It's funny how you can go 29 years without ever saying the phrase "supply chain" and then suddenly it's part of your daily vernacular.

How did White Claw not come out with a Christmas pack of White Claus?

My favorite part of the writing process is opening the document and then looking at my phone.

What's your favorite kind of takeout and why is it Thai?

Once you start eating popcorn how do you stop because being full doesn't seem to be the trick

literally how the f does anyone know how to spell medieval (obviously spell checked this)

Why is BB-8 so cute she's just two soccer balls but I would GIVE MY LIFE TO SAVE HER

Forget personality tests, just look at your Frequently Used emojis. Tells you all you need to know.

I hope I never get famous enough that I'm asked to throw a first pitch at a baseball game.

I ordered a smoothie at the airport and it came with a side of hot sauce. Not mad, just confused.

Say what you want about Zoom meetings — the somewhat blurry, poor quality feed does wonders for my complexion.

GUYS! My new radio show launches TONIGHT!!! Tune into Just Like Other Girls at 6:30pm on Amp!! live.onamp.com/shannonfiedler

trying to make plans in December 🫠 (w/ The Official Shannon Fiedler)

i dunno what heaven will be but i know there will be babaganoush