The casual tyranny of security theater illustrated in one tweet.

Breaking: elon abandons the concept of timelines

Good chance jd vance is lying about his dog 🫠🤦‍♀️

Some day the western world will see that they have been swindled into thinking they need an air fryer, but they had a convection setting on their oven all along

yall fell for the bait again

Are you ever like really really really disappointed in your kid?

Just got trolled by gymnastics 🙃

“How do you do it? Where do you find the time?” I do it in bulk, bb

Needs. Not wants

Elon musk gains self awareness

dear Mark Cuban, i have done the impossible and helped you defeat donald trump in a twitter poll i am now more powerful than elon please respond.

If i see a neon green ryobi power tool in your diy video i immediately dont trust you

Im excited for beetlejuice beetlejuice

Im a risk taker, and by that i mean i accidentally wore white jeans on my period

Gm its “corporates are mad at having responsibility time to punish the customer” season

Is there a polymarket bet for kesha blowing up in 2025?

I should have just ghosted