I love when Oscar Wilde says the only purpose of art is to create a mood. Free me from the tyranny of plot, Oscar.

me as a parent

on my walk today I saw lilies, a donut, and a dead bat.

Imprisoning innocent people for being poor is fascism

Imagine pretending to be a liberal while sucking off the New York Post.

My friend took my picture and why do I look so sweet.

Every guy I’ve ever dated has been this wife and honestly, yeah, it was fine.

weird me out? no. you’ve weirded me in. let’s merge souls

A guy at work was explaining how he used to detassel corn when he was a teen and it was a long story but basically when you pull the tassel off it turns the boy corn into girl corn and then they pollinate each other but the whole time I was only thinking omg everything is trans.

interesting

we swerved off of the road so fast to get this pic

When it’s 3 am but you had a cold brew at 6 pm

What’s funny is that the story behind every great song ever written begins: “I had taken my girlfriend Joni Mitchell to breakfast at a delicatessen…”

Just a nighttime stroll in the cemetery.

It's wild that feeding children was government waste and this is not

I’m sorry for using AI and it didn’t even do it right but you know what I’m talking about.