Cocker spaniel? I hardly know her spaniel!

Don’t worry, they’re going to announce Shane Gillis was fired as host in 5 days #SNL

That Fire Country ad has me ready to run through a wall! #firecountry

Could you imagine a whole music genre that’s sung with a specific type of Australian accent and about that lifestyle and I just get really into it and start making my own songs? Because that’s what Keith Urban did to america and I’m sick of people not talking about it

Well guys. We were snubbed this year, but thank you for all the support. I never even dreamed as a child that one day I would be “Academy Award nominated screenwriter of ‘Big 2: Even Bigger’” and I still am not, but there’s always next year #Oscars

Happy Opening Day! ⚾️ 🎥 The Lonely Island Presents: The Unauthorized Bash Brothers Experience on Netflix

Earthquake in New York? Must’ve been yo mama sitting down! 🤣🤣🤣yomama jokes Wilmer Valderrama

How Zach Edey’s been on Diarra tonight #FinalFour2024

Mulan is a great reminder that you shouldn’t stop your daughter from being the bloodthirsty warlord she longs to be on the inside

Sorry been watching Black Knight on Bounce, did something happen?

It took me 7 years to find out my wife could do the worm

My retirement plan is singing hip songs to young people at karaoke bars

If you thought luigi mangione's goodreads was crazy, his letterboxd account is even wilder

Randy is OK.

Thought it was a little tone def to give Joseph McCarthy a posthumous Tony, but he was the heartbeat of that show so I get it #TonyAwards

Serving cartoon mice tiny food on tiny plates is so disrespectful. That’s not how serving food works. We don’t all get plates proportional to our size.

I’m a fool to Bath and Body Works, oh yeah. I don’t wanna Bath and Body Works, no more.

Cocker spaniel? Um, I'll take the spaniel, thank you very much.