which is objectively worse to fall asleep while eating, only to wake with smothered on your disgusting body?

competitive ass eating

i feel the need to inform you all: my threat is not a lone one there will be aid rendered at your expense

when you just roll with it, everything is true everything

why do people keep cock blocking me from god?

you all deserve the most unholy combo mushed peas and melted chocolate, worked deeply into all of your tissues suffer

beautiful, big-titty, butt-naked women just don’t fall out of the sky, you know?

i’m don’t even see follower count you is or you ain’t you vibe or you viben’t

i am chronologically disabled i borrow from tomorrow, yet i file for bankruptcy when i try to collect my own dues

gm, my friends, and happy friday remember: if you know your why, you can survive any how

i do my best to not stress about whatever way the wind blows if the wind blows my way, i have a job for it a blow job, if you will

there is a certain kind of pent up rage that one can never share a secret discontent shaped not by it's form, but by it's intrusive void a malic of even being pigeonholed into being in the first place but you guys are cool tho

you can touch grass anywhere if you bring some in your pocket

new political compass

sunday funday time to bend some laws

if you can lift something, you can throw it believe in yourself

keep your enemies guessing

i am gratuitously discriminating my favorite food? purple before sunrise

kidneys start losing their usefulness after the third one i don’t recommend them