It is /immediately/ obvious that this task is bigger than I thought it was.

Twitter. 🐐

DELETE THIS!!?!?!?!’m

It should be illegal for Netflix to auto-play anything after Bo Burnham’s “Inside”. I’M REEXAMINING MY ENTIRE LIFE IM NOT GONNA START AN EP OF GILMORE GIRLS OK.

been teaching my french flat mates english idioms and one of them’s just messaged me a picture of my room, with the light left on, saying “is it blackpool illuminations?” ngl i’ve been absolutely bodied here

the masculine urge to be feminine

formula 1 has been the highest drama per event sport ive ever seen. highly recommend.

One of the maddest sporting moments I can ever remember. #F1

remember to regularly change your pronouns, for security reasons.

Stacy Cay hot girls go on twitter on Christmas

actual footage of you watching my insta stories today

Mask under the nose is the "my dick is too big for condoms" of the face

One morning Toad sat in bed. “I have many things to do,” he said. “I will write them all down on a list so that I can remember them.”

Then Toad felt very tired, and he fell asleep.

Frog made a fresh pot of tea. He sat down and began a story.

if i don’t leave with grammys tomorrow i will be formally turning in my resignation letter to the illuminati

a literal email i just sent to my accountants

This may seem like an ordinary portrait, but look closer. That grey mark at the bottom is actually a skull when viewed from the right angle. It's The Ambassadors, painted by Hans Holbein the Younger nearly 500 years ago, and one of art's greatest mysteries...

During the 2002 World Cup, I was working at Booklist Magazine and living in a small furnished apartment. I had just returned to work and Chicago after some psychological unpleasantness that I discuss in the "Harvey" section of The Anthropocene Reviewed.

Winning the league in every country in Europe - a thread.