Oihhhhh my body my little white body

i wish there was more kissing in baseball

aaron boone is kind of carlos mendoza’s wario

The welfare of the state depends upon the morals of its citizens

Happy birthday to America and let’s go Mets

Is harry making any sandwiches today

John Bacon must have a 6 p.m. dinner reservation

why the hell people always on facetime while ordering bagel

Drinking a beer on the roof

I’m naked in bed watching the Mets while drinking a cup of coffee

let this be a lesson. don't take peterson out

Everyday carry

Age gap summer featuring me and my younger therapist

It’s share your location with me indefinitely Sunday

cleared the inbox, feeling like a god

i've been on twitter for 19 years today! my account is so old they don't give me a graphic to post. do you remember what were you doing July 15, 2006 at 4:12pm?

Enjoying a sandwich in the park

I bought new socks and the vibe shifted

If the Mets win this series I’m posting hog