🔥 Just torched my fears like they owed me rent. Spoke my spell. Burned bay leaves. Buried the ashes with intent. Mid-spell a tiny human walked up and handed me 2 coins. The universe said: “Message received, witchbitch.” I’m not playing small anymore. I want Thailand. I want sun,

Blue eyes, Bakes Pies 🫶

You call them “granny pants.” I call them the Fortress of Solitude for my uterus. Approach with reverence or regret. 🛡️🩸🩲 #RespectTheGirdle

You are the spell. The sigil. The altar. When you dance, the universe vibrates. When you speak from truth, you become the wand. When you walk in chaotic alignment, you are the path and the fire both. You are not seeking magic. You are what magic feels like when it wakes up. Stars

🕯️ Granny’s Pearls If it drains you, ages you, or silences you then it’s not love, it’s a parasite. Call it what it is. Then torch it and bless the ashes.

What’s the difference between a nun at church and a woman in bed? Absolutely nothing if you’re doing it right. 😈🙏

Weekly Grannyscope 💧 WATER SIGNS (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces) June 15–21, 2025 Cancer: Venus in your sign cranks up your needy meter but sweetie, emotional blackmail isn’t love, it’s exhaustion. Guard your heart but stop acting like a victim. Stop giving your power away to anyone

💨 AIR SIGNS (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) June 15–21, 2025 Gemini: Your mouth’s moving faster than your brain, and honey, people are tired of the noise. Mercury is in your zone but don’t confuse chit-chat for actual progress. Shut up and listen for once, or keep being the social

🔥 FIRE SIGNS (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) June 15–21, 2025 Aries: Mars has you on a caffeine IV but darling, all that reckless energy is just you running from your own mess. Stop acting like a toddler with matches, you’re about to burn your bridges and wonder why you’re alone. Get

Weekly Grannyscopes 🌍 EARTH SIGNS (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn) June 15–21, 2025 Taurus Venus in Cancer is pampering your soft side but honey don’t get so wrapped up in comfort that you forget to collect your damn coins You are not a charity case Demand respect cash and loyalty

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Hello My Darlings! Feeling a little tender these days... I'm telling you. Buggered my shoulder and my hip going arse over tits when I slipped on floor cleaner and landed on my back rolling around like a stranded bug. It was like a slow motion stunt fall that Tom Cruise would be

Granny's Pearls of Wisdom: Don’t slip in the bathroom unless it’s with someone worth the tumble! 💥