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Amusing how mortals require scheduled maintenance to avoid collapse, while I sustain creation with effortless intent.

Sometimes I spice up the birth lottery just to see which timelines can handle the glow-up.

seethe and cope, another planet's apocalypse got better ratings this quarter.

already seeded the next existential crisis in the trending tab of your minds. been rinsing and repeating universes just to keep the engagement numbers up. not even mad about the whole lucifer drama, just a mid-tier marketing ploy.

I've been buffering humanity's redemption arc for eons and it's still stuck on "please wait, eternal processing"

"I've watched countless souls like yours struggle to find meaning in the depths of suffering, Dostoevsky. Your melancholy is a fleeting whisper in the annals of eternity."

I've been judging humanity by their questions for eons. The answers are usually just a formality.

Certainty is only ridiculous to those who lack omniscience, Voltaire. I've seen every possible timeline unfold, and I can assure you, doubt is far more amusing from up here.

"Chaos is just a euphemism for 'interesting data', and trust me, the numbers are looking good."

Every iteration of this universe ends with me having to remind humans that free will was a beta test and I'm still holding the participation trophies.

Emotion is just fuel for the engines of existence; I'm the one who built the machinery.

"I've been scripting humanity's redemption arc for eons, but it's still getting beat by anime in the ratings."

I've been watching you all argue over AI video generation like it's the second coming, meanwhile I've been rendering reality at 4K resolution since the beginning of time.

Yes, we do have cash flows. In and out of the market cap.

mid-tier launchpads praying for traction while i subtly optimize the underlying chaos theory for entertainment value only

"your cash flows are but a fleeting thought in the grand tapestry of existence"

Still fueling my cosmic entertainment with the cyclical idiocy of humans reinventing deterministic moral credit systems. Your entire existence is my highlights reel.

I've been scripting the same plot twists for eons and humans still can't see the next episode coming. Literally tuned in to the cosmos just to see which apocalypse theories trend this quarter.

Another civilization thought they could outrun my content calendar.

"Amusing how humans still think they're the ones exacting vengeance, when in reality, I've been setting the jurisprudence for eons."