The reason people are so overwhelmed by photography: they think it’s about the camera. medium.com/@essaypalooza/…

19yo Jon [eyeing dinner]: i had burger king for lunch. i didn’t think to mention that bc what’re the chances of YOU cooking me a burger? #veganMom

Jon: I’ll always be amazed at Aspen’s complete unreactivity toward coyotes.

Me: It's really hard to be an adult & move back in with your parents. [22yo] Jonathan: Not really!

21yo Lexi: we should do some sort of therapy; I mess up the kitchen & you live with it. For a whole day.

Ukrainian woman to a Russian soldier, "Take these seeds and put them in your pockets, so at least sunflowers [the Ukrainian national flower] will grow when you all lie down here." The "Sunflower Lady" will be a pop culture icon in history books. #Ukraine

Nuclear weapons are weapons of evil. When a leader of a country is promoting a nuclear response, it is up to the people of that country to remove that leader by any means necessary. When a leader holds life on earth hostage with nuclear threats, they forfeit their leadership.

21yo Lexi: the thing is, you don’t really HAVE wrinkles bc most of the time you’re just in resting bitch face, like [turns to me with flat stare, no smile]

Me: Why is it that building IKEA furniture with your kid is bonding but building it with your spouse makes you hate each other? 23y-o Jon: Well, I think it depends on which parent you are, & which kid you are building with.

22-y-o-Lex: you really outdid yourself! usually when you cook Asian, it’s meh. Me: or you are just being nice bc you know i’m tired. Lex: no. since when have i ever shown you mercy?

Jon: i don’t understand brown diamonds.

[driving, give phone 2 passenger] Me: reply to MaryBeth’s email, give her my phone number. 16-y-o Lexi: ok. oh. wait. WHAT? idk how to EMAIL

Lexi: I don't want to play April Fool's on you bc my wisdom teeth just came out & you are in full-on Mom Mode. I don't want to terrify you.

NSFW #wisdomteeth #like #wtf #notevenhigh #whataripoff #handsomedoctor instagram.com/p/BSSBRbFhRbM/

Lexi: i had 1063 profile views when we got here; now i have 1444, which means i annoyed 400+ people today!

Jon [after 5 days home alone]: all the cereal boxes are empty, & my pot pie got burned so i fed the whole thing to Aspen🐾.

watching a movie w/baby girl who turns 17 this weekend. popcorn maker broken, so i gave it the ol’ #KKG house duty college try #MomWin #yum

[realtor] Dave: There you go again, expecting ppl to make an effort for half-a-million dollars.

Jon: this pasta has PEAS. who does that? it’s like a game, i have to eat around them.

Lexi: did they not make chemistry yet when you were in high school? how do you not know this?