Finland: The train on her dress rippling away makes me wonder what her superpower is. Not to mention her sidekick there, The Cellist.

Israel: The giant clock clearly opens a portal to some sort of hell-dimension equivalent of the 60s.

San Marino: Electro fanservice. A dozen Mighty Boosh quotes spring to mind, as I can't stop picturing Vince Noir squeeing right now.

Cyprus: Happy shopper version of Anne Hathaway dancing on a henge to the kind of European dance that's just installed itself in your brain.

Denmark: Not feeling the cod-military outfit, but both song and singer are actually pretty good.

Russia: And as the Moscow branch of the W.I. pops out of the kitchen for a day...

Thank gods they kept the dance moves simple. I dread to think what the Russian is for "I've done me back in!"

Hungary: Weirdly like Savage Garden for a moment there. Not that I'm complaining, mind. The synth's a bit heavy though- the 80s are over!

Austria: Ah, just what we were missing, boys in nice jackets rapping! And their, uh, neon pole dancers.

Neon, lit by LEDs pole dancers. My mistake. Clearly this is a classy production.

Moldova: Singer's breathtakingly camp, even compared to the gazebos the backing dancers have clearly shaped their skirts in honour of.

Ireland: EVIL SPACE KNIGHTS OF GLITTER! It probably wouldn't be a bad song, just nonsense, if someone else was singing it. Anyone else.

Oh green gods they're talking. And now being pissed on by the stage itself. Close to the waterline, indeed.

Whisk looks pretty interesting. It reckons it'll help with leftover ideas. signup.whisk.co.uk whisk.co.uk/?lrRef=5yqj8 via Nick Holzherr

ar.gy/245K via Lulu.com

Behold the glory of my first cookbook! Behold, I say!

Delicious NEW Cadbury #EggNSpoon - Chop off the top & scoop out the yum! Retweet if you'd love to share a box ;) vine.co/v/b1ej2K29Q0u

Hey, who here is following Mermaid Chocolate by any chance?

Goodness, did I pick the wrong day to have a nose at my Twitter feed.

Buggeration, I've been hacked! Sorry about that, I'll change my password sharpish.