Are you crying? Me: No Look at me Me:

I’m scared I won’t recognise him the day he shaves his. Lucky he refuses to ever do more than trim

In the last couple of weeks I've learned from the police / media if I want to avoid going missing or being murdered I need to: Not be too ambitious or high-achieving. Not earn more than my partner (too late) Not go to a park. Not to drink alcohol. Not to go through menopause.

I'm gonna swing from the chandelierrrr

“I‘m knackered today” “Why?” “Just… being alive and that”

I just wonder what would happen physiologically if Gwyneth Paltrow were to drink say a Lucozade original

Hope you all had a great St Patrick's day!

When you want to be a ballerina but end up as a possessed cabbage.

happy eurovision eve, don’t forget to put a glass of prosecco out by the chimney for graham norton x

Apart from the hay fever, the constant sweat, the sunburn, the lack of sleep, the wasps, the bug bites, the baking hot car, the 3am sunrise, the non-stop disco from next door’s garden, the yellow lawn, the heat rash, the absence of air con and the complete lack of energy… I’m

woobox.com/b7pu5b/pwsxol

gofund.me/d14cd20c.

gofund.me/a7eb786d #GoFundMe.

A visual representation of the healing power of time 📹fallinginsand

running an errand after the sun has gone down………….that’s a quest

Same hun. Same

Taco Bell employee tries their new Baja Blast Pie Even after letting it sit out over an hour, you can see the texture stretches like Play-Doh. Not to mention it looks like a bright bar of soap with crust This is not food. It’s chemicals