a bike outdoors is so small and maneuverable but a bike in your house is the most cumbersome thing on earth

we are beyond saving

wow i fucking called it 2 years ago

is there other people names Michigan or is J Frog the only one

i miss swag

look at this goat

normalize asking people if they have any secrets upon first meeting them

was sebastian the turtle from little mermaid a pervert

one good thing is that i got a promotion. one bad thing is that my boss said “i had chatgpt write your job offer so let me know is anything looks weird”

my spirit guides told me i need to start calling everyone “rockstar”

guy who moves to LA because he got a Rob Delaney retweet

wow, did not see this coming! Into the Ocean by Blue October is projected to be song of the summer 2025

The 7/11 guy thanked me for not parking directly in front of the store because every day at 5pm he “waters the pigeons” by turning on the hose in the parking lot so they can bathe and drink

crazy amount of couples at the renaissance faire yesterday where the girl is dressed up in an elaborate period-accurate outfit and the guy is just wearing jeans and a Sleep Token shirt

should i lift the cover?

this dog looks like the type of dog that would get stung by a bee and get all swollen

going out to eat is expensive but they never talk about how groceries are also expensive

just tried to use the “tom, dick, and harry” idiom but accidentally said “tom, mark, and travis”

an early 2000’s myspace emo band called To See The Rizzler Grow Old