Been feeling all gross and dirty from self isolation and quarantine lately... Who's going to steal me away to their lab, sterilize, sanitize and alter my body, delete my mind? Just pure, clean, and shiny inside and out? A null latex object ready to help process the next subject~

Are you telling me an egg fried this rice? *Scene cuts to chef* Chef: I wish I was a girl.

Our latest tests of @ElonMusk's dangerous and defective Tesla Full Self-Driving software reveal that it will repeatedly run down a child mannequin in a stroller: dawnproject.com/safety-tests-r…

In a weird mood were i just wanna go down on someone/anyone

got introduced as a dog to someone tonight and they immediately went “puppy!!!! hi puppy!!” and started scritching my head and under my chin and that’s how everyone should say hello to me from now on

The onion scrubbed this from their site you're welcome

polyamory at pride discourse? no thank you i am too busy kissing multiple women