me and my girl don't argue she grabs the back of my neck like a dog and I submit

oooooo he pisses me off so bad I want to put him in a little box and shake him around violently

girls when they like a fictional man

puppy bf i can pet all over and hug and love

drinkin😋

Oi wat is all this a bout en? Can’t have me a morning jillwaggy without the royal cunts spyin’ on mi gnosh viewin habits? Pish posh

the british are coming? nuh uh they can’t even watch twitter porn rn

ragebaiting them when they’re drunk is 10x funnier btw :D

be honest… would u still love me if i turned into a whiny little mess that needed ur full attention forever

should i make lunch or touch myself and cry

the biggest freaks are virgins btw

you think i’m perverted and unhinged now… without ever seeing my ao3 bookmarks… i see

physically? at work. mentally?? jorkin it.

IM GONNA FUCKING SCREAM