Mr. Met, in both name and form, has to be the laziest concept for a mascot there’s ever been

I wish it was Forrest Gum because then we would have bubble gum shrimp restaurants instead

This is how I watch sports in my living room ever since I turned 34

Vini Jr after the final whistle on Saturday

Thinking about all the peanuts I could have eaten that fell off every payday I’ve ever had

There are two types of dudes in the chat

Honestly I’m kinda impressed Trump correctly used the word “concept”

The New York Yankees can still win the World Series if Mike Pence has the courage to do the right thing

Me and the boys whenever we see a big dog

me everytime I see the mailman

I’m over these fires gimme some fries

Check on your friends who sing suddenly Seymour at karaoke

Me: going out with the guys tonight, you and your friends should roll thru Her: idk maybe, are your friends cute? Me: yeah My friends:

Damn it was about a gorilla this whole time

bro is too stupid to think of food

I forgot that this is what it's all about

me watching Unknown Number

Very upsetting that the cgi ducklings in the new dawn commercial have adult voices