Fireworks? In this economy?

Are eggs free yet?

aged like milk 🥛

Say “Brian Schottenheimer” three times and the new head coach of the Dallas Football Cowboys will appear in your social media feed.

This is so sad. Not Luka. You can’t just strip away part of a city’s identity like this. This cuts deeper than basketball.

It’s not even remotely close to being the same thing. Micah Parsons is not engrained into the culture of this city. Luka was this city’s entire aura.

#MFFL

Sharing this A+ analysis on the Luka trade by the always insightful Christopher Kratovil Makes a ton of sense to me from the #txlege angle - esp considering Lite Patrick likely done next Session. Good stuff. Read it 👇🏼 #txlege #MFFL

Patrick Mahomes is broken

Patrick Dumont is a pussy.

If middle class millennials ever figure out to how to sell their parents’ Precious Moments figurines it is fucking over for the rest of you hoes.

3 weeks in and those dolts got America looking like an episode of Veggie Tales that’s set in post-Batman Gotham City

Daily plane crashes were not on my Late Stage Capitalism bingo card.

Ever since the Mavs lost Luka Fridays at American Airlines Center don’t hit the same. Empty seats everywhere, courtside to the top row Keep withholding your wallets Keep showing Dumont, Adleson, and Nico that the fans can’t be gaslit and their only way out of this mess is to SELL THE TEAM!

Public service: If, say a politician, calls 2nd Corinthians "Two Corinthians" or if an NBA owner calls the NBA Finals the "championship games", then it is possible you are being conned. There are always little tells to reveal that they don't actually know ball.

By my counts (including tonight's game): The Mavericks have 14 games left. Kessler Edwards: 3 NBA games of eligibility left Kai Jones: 11 NBA games of eligibility left Brandon Williams: 6 NBA games of eligibility Mavs do not have enough room to sign a player under their first

Zedd has now set a new record for most guest appearances in a single Coachella set.

At long last, The Great Dallas Nightmare has ended. Couldn’t have dreamed up a more pathetic and apropos ending to the worst sports season of my life. Fire Nico. Sell the team. Go Lakers.

Goodnight Dallas Mavericks fans.

Crazy how we’re actually gonna have a new pope before an NFL team drafts Shedeur Sanders