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No, no. My vibrator is staying in its place in the bottom drawer.

I’ll let my husband know you said hello.

Cute. But, no. My camera is all out of batteries.

As I’ve said, sounds tempting. But it’ll take a little more than a pretty face and smooth talker for me to send my husband pictures or the fun we’d be having.

You’re very insistent and it’s sweet. Sham or not, there’s a higher threshold when vows are involved. And, you, my dear, don’t quite meet the benchmarks.

[forces a smile] The rumor mill also said you were charming. [dragging her eyes over him] Guess you shouldn’t believe everything you hear.

Then the pleasure of your company must be pretty damn cheap.

#NewProfilePic

Darling (starter for Odette Selvaggio) Read: tl.gd/n_1srurtg

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What if the cat’s a girl!

You are an asshole that’s hard to love.

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je t'aime (Mentions Howard Quimby, Haldor Brager V, Esq., Peter Darling) Read: tl.gd/n_1ss1sbg

TW: Domestic abuse over on Wendy Rossen

Wait. Someone’s playing hooky!?